Weddings in the Seven Kingdoms seem to always end in bloodshed. So let’s see where the characters land after all the wedding mayhem that took place.
1. Queen Alicent Hightower
This is the week where we finally see Queen Alicent break away from her former best friend Princess Rhaenyra. It feels like Princess Rhaenyra is set up as the protagonist of the show, but we certainly empathize with what Queen Alicent is going through. Queen Alicent’s (ex) best friend lies to her about hooking up with a guy last week, and Ser Criston Cole unknowingly reveals this secret to the Queen. To add insult to injury, Princess Rhaenyra also convinces her dad, King Viserys, to fire Queen Alicent’s father, Otto Hightower, as Hand of the King.
All of the lies from Princess Rhaenyra (plus an impassioned plea from Otto Hightower) convinces Queen Alicent to take a clear side. She makes the decision that her son, Prince Aegon, will become the next person to sit on the Iron Throne instead of Princess Rhaenyra. When she enters the wedding hall wearing a green dress, it shows that she is ready to go to war, and she’s making a call for allies.
2. Ser Larys Strong
Ser Larys, the son of the Hand of the King, is showing that he may actually be this show’s Littlefinger. Queen Alicent is content and happily believing Princess Rhaenyra’s lies until Ser Larys showed up and revealed that Princess Rhaenyra drank a tea (essentially the King’s Landing version of Plan B). Ser Larys is sneaky and smart — a dangerous combo in the Seven Kingdoms.
3. Princess Rhaenyra Targaryen
Princess Rhaenyra’s lies and impulsiveness finally come back to bite her. Ser Criston Cole is obsessed with her after their one-night stand, and he’s ready to give everything up to marry her. Queen Alicent finds out that Princess Rhaenyra lies to her about losing her virginity. Also, Queen Alicent is pissed that Princess Rhaenyra engineered the ousting of her dad, Otto Hightower, as Hand of the King. Princess Rhaenyra has some very powerful enemies now, and it’s clear that they’re going to go to battle against each other in the future.
4. Sea Snake
He convinces King Viserys that the children of Princess Rhaenyra and Ser Laenor will be born with the last name Velaryon. Their last name will only change when (or if) one of their children ends up sitting on the Iron Throne. At that point, their last name will change to Targaryen to keep the Targaryen dynasty going. That’s a pretty solid deal struck by Lord Corlys Velaryon!
5. Ser Criston Cole
Who would have thought that Ser Criston Cole and Princess Rhaenyra’s one-night stand would end up like this? Ser Criston’s honor is all he has to his name, and he feels like he has destroyed that honor after hooking up with Princess Rhaenyra. Why? Well, because he took an oath of chastity as a knight in Princess Rhaenyra’s Kingsguard. He is so wracked with guilt that he feels like he needs to go to extreme measures to make amends. He proposes to Princess Rhaneyra and says they should run away together. Ser Criston’s assumption that Princess Rhaenyra will run away from being the queen sitting on the Iron Throne to be with him is a wild show of confidence and hubris. When she turns him down, he begins to spiral down even more.
Queen Alicent has no idea that Ser Criston hooked up with Princess Rhaenyra, but the depressed knight fails to see between the lines during their conversation and ends up confessing his “sins” to the Queen. He thinks she’s going to sentence him to death, but she (unsurprisingly) lets him go.
Seeing Ser Criston absolutely pummel Ser Joffrey Lonmouth’s face to a pulp at Princee Rhaenyra’s wedding party is crazy. He is set off by the most minor thing ever and decides to kill a man. On the heels of that, he decides to commit Westerosi seppuku in the Godswood, but his savior, Queen Alicent, stops him from doing so. This is sure to be one of the key alliances to shape Prince Aegon’s battle with Princess Rhaenyra to be the next Targaryen sitting on the Iron Throne.
6. King Viserys
King Viserys just can’t win. He thinks that he’s finally set up the perfect marriage for his daughter, but Ser Criston and Queen Alicent just have to come in and ruin the moment. You can see the worry on his face throughout the wedding as he does his best to chow down the food before something crazy happens. King Viserys is coughing up blood, and nobody even cares. Poor guy.
7. Laenor Velaryon
Ser Laenor loses his lover, Ser Joffrey, and gets decked by Ser Criston in the process. He may be the King consort now, but it came at a cost that he might not be able to handle in the long term.
8. Prince Daemon Targaryen
He was banished by his older brother in the last episode, but this week he shows up in King’s Landing (again). The dude is seriously hitting on his niece during her own wedding — shortly after killing his own wife. On top of that, he has the audacity to ask his wife’s cousin for her inheritance. Can’t believe that we actually were cheering for Prince Daemon a couple weeks ago.
9. People named Joffrey at King’s Landing weddings
Ser Joffrey Lonmouth doesn’t stand a chance. Once he utters a word to Ser Criston Cole, his time is up. Ser Criston is a ticking time bomb that’s ready to go off at any second. It’s pretty clear that if your name is Joffrey, and you’re at a King’s Landing, you’re probably gonna die.