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While the rest of the city is caught up in inaugural festivities, the detectives are dealing with a suicide threat from a political fanatic.

Barney Miller

Inauguration

A man liquidates all of his assets into gold, much to his wife's dismay. Wojo claims he saw a UFO over Staten Island.

The Sighting

Evaluation reports cause worry for the detectives while the elderly owners of a porno store lodge a vandalism charge.

Evaluation

A ventriloquist and his obscene dummy keep the detectives company when a wild-eyed gunman forces them to spend time in the precinct's cell.

Hostage

Barney has been shot; The dangers of police work upset Barney's wife; An old woman objects to nude painting on display in an art gallery.

Quo Vadis?

The detectives' new female colleague has a jealous husband; and Wojo brings his bedroom problems to work.

Wojo's Problem

Barney is faced with the choice of ousting poor tenants from a dilapidated hotel or facing departmental charges.

Eviction

Barney bargains for soon-to-be-evicted tenants of a condemned hotel. Luger tries to decide how to spend his vacation time.

A woman lodges a rape charge against her husband; A master of disguise perpetuates a crime spree; To Yemana's delight, the city legalizes off-track betting.

Rape

An aging bounty hunter and a sugar addict are the precinct's latest guests; and Yemena is rushed to the hospital after an appendicitis attack.

Appendicitis

Demonic possession, an illegal alien and an accountant with a pocketful of marijuana make up a day's work at the precinct.

The Ghost

An angry citizen creates a disturbance when he learns that his deposit at a sperm bank has been accidentally ruined.

The Bank

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Capt. Barney Miller of the NYPD 12th Precinct and his staff handle the various local troubles and characters that come into the squad room.

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The officers are unable to remove a corpse from the station house during a blizzard; and an eccentric swears that the snow is the start of a new ice age.

S4 E7 | Blizzard